after re-reading my last few posts, I have figured out what is wrong.
I am tired of being the grown-up. I run the budget, pay the bills, allocate the funds for clothing, school fees, everything, mostly do the shopping, admittedly, I have Hubby or one of the older kids with me.
I organize Christmas presents and birthday presents.
All the stuff that helps the house run........
I don't want to be the grown up anymore.
I KNOW what I'm getting for Christmas from my husband and kids....I BOUGHT it!!
I KNOW what m in-laws are giving me.....I BOUGHT it
....can we see a pattern here???
oh, and to mek me feel SO much better?? I went to my dr on Friday.......he has increased my anti anxiety medication.
But hang on, my anxiety has INCREASED since I started them.....
also.....I'm not comfortable being the size that I am. I want to lose weight. Dr says "don't worry about losing weight.....that will happen when we start to DECREASE the anti-depressants"
So, I can deduce that some of my "I feel fat, unloved and horrible" is actually caused by the medication that is supposed to make me feel NOT depressed.
After the doctor visit, DH wants to cheer me up.......he says we can go buy some fabric for my Dear Jane quilt.
The budget-priced quilt shop is right near my dr's office.
I didn't know that their minimum cut is 20cm (8 inches, a fifth of a metre/2 ninths if a yard).
All I need is a 10cm (4 inch) cut, so no fabric acquistion(sp?)
I know that I can buy fat 1/16ths on ebay, (from a US seller, 50 per pack), but I try to support my Australian quilt shops.
I did find a store that had a bundle of 27 pieces, cut 10cm by half the width of fabric for $64.50
that would make each piece a fat 20th, costing about $2.39 each, or $47.75 per metre off the bolt.
I didn't buy that fabric either.
and believe it or not.......
I DO have a wonderful husband and children
I have medical coverage, many in the world do not
Christmas *only* comes once a year
I haven't completely broken the budget yet
the REALLY expensive fabric stayed in the store